Mothers’ stories
Becoming a mother
What to do, where to go
“Before coming to this country, I tried to get pregnant many times, but it just didn´t happened, after a year in Finland I became pregnant, and I was the happiest I have ever been. Because we are not Finnish and we don´t have close Finnish friends, we didn’t know what to do or where to go, so I went to my health station and asked, there the person in the reception did not speak English very well so she had to ask a nurse to come and help. She told me to go in an app and make an appointment so a doctor could order the tests and send me to the clinic if it was needed.”
Many questions and fears
“The first time I want to the doctor he didn´t asked much information, I had many questions and fears because of my previous experiences, and I tried to ask, but he only ask standard questions and told me I needed to go and do some test, I asked for directions and more information about what came after the test and he said, we will see after and say goodbye.”
A happy moment
“After the test results, I was had another appointment with a different doctor. During the appointment she told me the result came back positive, and I was pregnant, I started to cry, it was a happy moment for me, she looked at me and didn´t even asked why I was crying, she just continues to look at the computer writing something down there.”
Questions
“I tried to compose myself and started to tell her about my story and why I was crying, she stopped me and asked me questions related to my health and my partners health. After some minutes of questions, she told me I was going to be send to a special unit where they have specialized care for pregnant people, I though to myself, finally I will have my own OBGYN.”
Always new doctors
“When attending the new clinic, I had four different doctors during my whole pregnancy, and during the leaver process I had one doctor that I had never seen before who did not even ask my husband for his name.”
What about mental health support?
“Throughout the different appointments I thought my mental health was rarely considered, I didn´t have the chance to see a psychologist or anything like it, they did offer a support group for immigrant women who were pregnant or had just had their babies. I felt on many occasions like the fact that we are not Finnish people even when feeling I really needed the support, especially because we are alone in this country.”
I still don’t know why I felt shame
“When talking with professionals some weird questions came along, like if I had any particular rituals that I expected to do during labor. I ask, like what?, and they responded, I don´t know, but I think many of the things that you do in your country you will not be ale to do here, we have very strict protocols for your safety and the safety of your child, I didn’t reply to this, I didn´t know how to, because I really didn´t understand what this person meant by that question, I just stayed quiet and ashamed, but I still don’t know why I felt shame.”
Four stories as one
This story is based on the experience of four different women of different immigrant background, skin color and mother tongue, and even though they haven’t meat each other, there are several similarities in their stories.
–JeS Story by Catalina
